When a loved one dies, visiting their gravestone can help you feel closer to them. During these visits, it’s normal to leave tokens on the grave to show your love and let others know that someone stopped by. While many cemeteries have rules about which items can be left at a grave, the following examples are generally accepted and won’t interfere with other visitors.

3 Appropriate Items to Leave on a Grave

1. Flowers

Flowers are the most traditional gifts to leave by your loved one’s gravestone. Most cultures have customs about decorating graves with flowers as a way to honor them.

If you’re paying respects to a spouse, choose bouquets consisting of red and pink roses, calla lilies, and white carnations for remembrance of your love, friendship, and marriage. For a close friend or relative, zinnias, hydrangeas, and sunflowers are better options. Consider leaving a wreath comprised of these flowers as a symbol of hope that the person has passed on to a better place.

2. Coins

Leaving coins on headstones is an ancient tradition. In Ancient Rome, soldiers would place a coin in a fallen comrade’s mouth so that they would have payment to cross the River Styx in Hades. In Ancient Greece, families would lay coins over the eyes of their loved ones to give to Charon. 

Today, it’s common to leave a penny to show that someone has visited. If you served in the military with the deceased, leave a nickel if you were in training together, a dime if you served together, or a quarter if you were with the individual when they died in combat.

3. Wind Chimes

Wind chimes are often used to fend off bad energies and enhance good ones. Leaving one or two in a tree above a beloved’s grave is believed to protect their spirit. In some instances, they’re also used to remember a person who loved music. However, in areas with a lot of wildlife, they are commonly hung to scare off deer and other animals from eating the flowers.

Regardless of your reasoning, make sure to check with the cemetery about the decorations first. In some areas, wind chimes could create too much sound pollution and disturb other mourners. Please do not leave anything that has significant monetary value.

A custom-made gravestone can provide a clear marker for your loved one and hold your gifts between visits. For nearly 50 years, Tri-County Memorials has crafted premiere memorials for families in Waterford, CT. They use a vast selection of colors and styles and high-quality materials. Call (860) 443-8744 for Waterford, (860) 886-6200 for Norwich, or (860) 456-8658 for Willimantic,.to start planning a design, or visit their website to learn more about their services.