Divorce can be a difficult concept for anyone, of any age, to process. Even an amicable, quick divorce brings significant changes to a family, and even adults can struggle to make sense of what it means and how it will affect their relationships with their parents moving forward. Here’s how to tell your adult children that you and your spouse are divorcing.
How to Tell Your Adult Children You're Getting a Divorce
1. Break the News Early & Together
As soon as you and your partner decide to split, tell the kids. They shouldn't find out about the divorce on social media or hear it through other family members or friends.
Also, aim to break the news together with your spouse. This presents a united front and ensures that the kids understand that you will always be a family. Having your spouse at your side will provide some additional support, especially if one of your children has an intense emotional response.
2. Don't Assign Blame
Whether you're planning a quick divorce or a protracted legal battle, avoid blaming each other in front of your kids. You might assume that your adult children are old enough to witness parental fights, but these arguments can still be difficult for them to see. Try to remain civil for the sake of the kids and to maintain healthy family relationships.
3. Don't Overshare
Adult children are better able to understand why relationships end, and they can more easily handle the concepts associated with divorce. However, that doesn't mean that you should feel you need to tell them all the reasons behind the split.
Refrain from sharing with them all the overly personal details, even after the divorce is finalized. They have every right to view both parents with equal love, esteem, and regard. If you have deeply personal recriminations or hostilities, they shouldn't impact how the kids feel about their parents.
Part of any divorce involves drawing up the necessary legal paperwork. We The People of NY in New York City provides document preparation for a variety of legal situations, including quick divorces, simple wills, and easy bankruptcy filings. Every document is completed in accordance with all applicable legal guidelines. Call (212) 633-2200 or visit them online to start the quick divorce process.