Writing a eulogy while mourning and making funeral service plans can be challenging. If the prospect of writing a speech that others will hear makes you uncomfortable, remember that this can be a cathartic moment to remember the person you love and to honor their life in a meaningful way. Here are a few general do’s and don’ts for writing an appropriate eulogy.

Do:

Keep it conversational.

The standard eulogy highlights the life of the deceased in a positive manner. You can use this opportunity to mention things like the person’s accomplishments, personality traits, sense of humor, and anything special or noteworthy that occurred during their lifetime.

Avoid making it too formal. Instead, your words should be natural, conversational, and authentic. Think of it as telling a story that allows everyone at the funeral service to remember the very best about the person.

Discuss it with others.

Turn to family members and friends and invite them to share their own stories and memories of the deceased. Ask if you can use those anecdotes to write a more personal eulogy. This is a difficult time for everyone involved, and it can be comforting to share these poignant moments with one another.

Don’t:

Write a list.

While making a list of events and details that you want to include is helpful, try to avoid making the eulogy itself feel like a list. You don’t need to follow a formal outline that begins with the person’s place of birth, education, and career highlights.

Those details are best reserved for the obituary. A eulogy should focus on the meaningful and pertinent details about the person’s life, like their relationships and passions.

Get stressed out.

It’s understandable to feel lost and isolated during times of grief. It can be challenging to feel productive during moments like these. When writing, take as many breaks as you need, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.

Be patient with yourself and remember that if you don’t feel up to reading the eulogy on your own, you can always ask a loving family member or friend to do so instead.

During times of grief, families throughout Rochester, NY, trust the caring and compassionate professionals at Leo M. Bean and Sons Funeral Home. For over 40 years, this funeral home has been helping families design funeral services that meaningfully memorialize lost loved ones. Visit the website to find out more or call (585) 426-7830 to speak with a representative.