Parents ending their marriages face crucial decisions about how to inform their children. Some spouses seek individual and family counseling before, during, and after the divorce to help with this process. If you haven’t talked to a counselor yet, the below tips will aid you in handling the first divorce discussion.

How to Discuss Divorce With Kids

1. Tell All the Children Together

If it’s practical and safe, your spouse and all the kids should be present when you share the news. Telling everyone at once eliminates the appearance that a parent favors one child over another by telling that child first. Telling one child and not the others can put unnecessary pressure on the informed child, especially if they cannot share the information with their siblings.

2. Plan the Time & Location

Think about when and where you are going to tell your child about the divorce. Plan a time when everyone is mentally alert and physically rested. Consider having the discussion in the late morning on the weekend, rather than at the end of a school or workday. Choose a quiet, private location that is comfortable for everyone. If there is a place where family discussions usually occur, that may be the right setting. You want a place that allows your kids to display their emotions and ask questions without embarrassment.

3. Answer Questions

You should prepare to answer any questions from the children. They will want to know their living arrangements and whether they can continue attending their same schools and activities. Plan with your spouse on how to respond. If you already have a custody arrangement and parenting plan, it’s easier to answer those questions. Maintaining stability and a routine, as well as telling the kids what to expect, helps them make the transition.

4. Reassure Them

Your children might wonder how you feel about them and whether you think they are the reason for the breakup. Tell your kids you love them and always will, and they are not at fault. You should say this often. Individual and family counseling professionals recommend that you reassure them with words and actions. Simple acts work well, such as hugging, spending time with them, and listening to what they say without judgment or anger. If you make a promise, be sure you can keep it.

If you’re a parent considering divorce and think that individual and family counseling might help, turn to NorthKey Community Care. This counseling center has a 53-year history of offering high-quality family and child services throughout the Covington, KY, area. These skilled professionals combine evidence-based research, practical advice, and deep compassion in guiding families through difficulties and behavioral issues. For more information about their services, visit this center online. To schedule a confidential appointment, call (859) 331-3292.