For parents, one of the hardest aspects of ending a marriage is telling the children. While there’s no easy way to break the news, there are ways to minimize the stress on all parties involved when discussing divorce. By following the tips in this guide, you can reduce the emotional feelings your kids will experience upon learning about the divorce.
Present a United Front
If circumstances allow, tell the kids about the divorce together. Presenting a united front will reinforce the idea that you’ll all still be a family, no matter what. It will also ensure the kids don't get mixed messages. If you were to discuss the situation separately, you and your spouse might give them different answers to the same question.
Generally, it’s also wise to tell all the children together. You might be inclined to tell the older kids first, but doing is placing an unfair burden on them. Keeping that news from their siblings will only make it weigh on them more.
Be Open & Honest
When facing a major transition that will change their lives forever, children deserve to know why. As such, it's important to answer their questions honestly. That doesn't mean you have to give them all the messy details about the split, though. Make sure to tailor your answers to their age and maturity level.
While being honest is crucial, try not to tell them anything that would place doubt or blame on the other parent. For example, avoid telling them that the divorce was initiated by one parent. Also, should they ask if you’ll ever get back together, for example, don't say “maybe” if you’re certain you won't.
Robert G. Moore, Attorney at Law understands just how stressful ending a marriage can be, especially when children are involved. Practicing out of Jackson, CA, this family lawyer has been in the legal field for over 50 years. If you’ve decided to file for divorce, he can assist with every aspect of the proceedings, from dividing assets to determining custody. To learn more about his family law services, visit his website. To schedule a consultation, call (209) 257-1728.