The loss of a grandparent is often one of the first experiences with death that a person will have. While it may seem challenging to help your child deal with grief, the tips below will help prepare them for the funeral and support them during a difficult time.

A Guide to Helping Your Child When a Grandparent Passes Away

1. Talk About Feelings

Being able to express feelings is an essential part of grieving for everyone, including children. Allow your child to have an emotional response but know that grief may be delayed until the real impact of the death sinks in. Listen to your child and answer any questions they have simply and succinctly. Avoid referring to death euphemistically as sleep or rest or transitioning, as these terms may be confusing and cause the child to have fear about their own sleep. 

2. Prepare Them for the Funeral

Decide if it is appropriate for your child to attend the funeral. If they were close to the grandparent, letting them attend the funeral service will allow them to say goodbye and begin to understand this inevitable part of life. It is essential to prepare them for what they might encounter, including the casket, and the varied responses to grief, such as crying and laughter.

If they haven’t been to a religious service before, explain briefly what will happen. If you plan to let them view the body, describe what they will see, and ask if they want to write a letter or card to put in the casket. Arrange for another family member to help the child view the body if you are feeling the loss deeply and need time to grieve.

3. Help Them Understand Grief

Part of growing up is learning about death. Your child may express a range of feelings and behaviors as they begin to understand that the grandparent won’t be coming back. They may complain of physical symptoms, such as headaches or feeling tired.

Help them understand that everyone is grieving, including you, and that it will get better in time. The child may continually ask where the loved one is. Decide on a consistent answer from family members, especially if there are different belief systems, as it is confusing for the child if they hear conflicting stories.

If your family has lost a loved one, turn to the compassionate, caring staff at Porto Funeral Homes in New Haven County, CT. They have served the community for over 75 years and will help you plan a funeral and make arrangements for burial or cremation. Call (203) 467-3000 to make an appointment in East Haven, or visit their website to learn more about how they can help. Call (203) 934-5000 to reach their West Haven office.