When it comes to your loved ones, there’s never an easy way to bring up their passing—especially with people as influential to your life as your parents. Still, by knowing where they stand on the general concept and what vision they have for its many details, you can arrange a funeral service they would have treasured. Before diving right into this sensitive topic, use the following guide to ensure the conversation is as smooth and productive as possible.

How to Approach the Subject

Find a time when your mother and father are calm and have at least an hour or so to sit down and chat with you. If they are no longer married, you’ll probably want to sit them down separately. In a quiet, private space, let them know you want them to regard the future with peace of mind.

Tell them that while you wish they would never pass, you are committed to honoring their legacy and celebrating the impact they left on the world when the time comes. Let them know that if they’re willing, you’re open to talk about their wishes for the proceedings, so you can ensure they are carried out appropriately. 

What to Ask

Once you have a sense that your parents are open to a discussion, ask them if they want to talk now or mull over their options and discuss it in the near future; after all, you want them to feel reassured—not rushed. When they’re ready, start with the most important question—would they like to buried or cremated? Write down specifics about their requests, such as burying or scattering the ashes, the coffin material, burial site, and monument preference. Then, ask if they would like the service to align with a certain religion and if they have a specific funeral home or location in mind. 

Once you’ve covered the basics, you can move onto more minute details such as readings and songs and allowed attendees and who will write and deliver the eulogy. Ask them what they would like guests to wear to the funeral, and whether they would prefer flowers or charitable donations. Finally, ask your parents if there are any other details they would like to share with you, so you can ensure their funeral service is everything they expected.

If you’re in the midst of planning a parent’s funeral, Fossum Funeral Home in Onalaska, WI, can help. They have been guiding clients to dignified decisions since 1926, providing traditional Christian funeral services, as well as cremations and memorials. Whether you’d like help planning the details or enduring the grieving process, call them at (608) 783-9777 today. You can also visit their website to learn more about their history.