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If your son or daughter brings home someone you don’t approve of, it can cause a serious rift in the family. However, as long as this individual remains in your child’s life, you’ll inevitably have to find ways to get along. Thankfully, there are various strategies for navigating such a complicated dynamic, such as communication and family counseling.

4 Tips for Dealing With Your Child’s Partner 

1. Be Patient & Open-Minded 

Meeting a partner’s parents can be intimidating. As such, judging your son or daughter’s love interest solely on your first impression of them may be unfair. Give this individual a chance, and remember that it may take time for him or her to open up. Think about the first time you met your spouse’s parents, and how your relationship changed over time. Consider approaching the situation through your child’s perspective. What drew them to this individual? If they’re attracted to their partner’s responsibility, wittiness, or positive attitude, for example, make an active effort to draw out these traits in your interactions. 

2. Express Your Concerns 

family-counselingIf you have genuine concerns about your son or daughter’s future, it’s okay to address them diplomatically. In fact, keeping such negative emotions bottled up is only going to fuel resentment. However, once you share these concerns, drop the subject. Make sure not to issue any ultimatums during the conversation. After all, your child is an adult who can make their own decisions. 

3. Seek Professional Guidance 

If you’ve tried everything but still can’t seem to get along, family counseling may be the answer. Whether you attend alone, with your spouse, or with your son or daughter, a relationship counselor can help. After evaluating the situation, a family counseling expert will offer tailored suggestions for navigating the situation with grace and devising satisfactory compromises that work for everyone. 

 

 

To discuss your family’s dynamics with an experienced therapist, turn to Laurie Burns LCSW-R CGP. For more than two decades, this licensed professional counselor has advised families throughout Rochester, NY, and the surrounding area. A certified member of the American Group Psychotherapy Association, she helps clients find practical solutions for the dilemmas they're facing. To schedule a family counseling session, call (585) 734-6826. Visit her website to find out more about her team’s services.

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