Death can be a difficult topic for anyone to comprehend, but children are especially prone to confusion, questions, and intense emotions around this subject. When a loved one passes away, many parents inevitably wonder if it is appropriate and healthy for their child to attend the funeral. Below are some important aspects to know that can ultimately form your decision.

Age & Maturity Levels Are Crucial Factors to Consider

In general, children should be allowed to attend a funeral once they are of an age and maturity level where they can sit still during formal events. If your child has reached this stage, ask them if they want to attend. Giving them the autonomy to make the decision for themselves is an empowering and important part of growing up, being responsible, and showing their respect to the person who has passed away.

Think About the Relationship

If a child is unsure what to do, or they have not yet reached a point where they can be quiet and calm during formal events, consider the relationship they have with the deceased. When the deceased is someone with whom the child is closely related, such as a grandparent, a funeral offers a healthy and therapeutic way to grieve and bring closure—even if the child does not fully understand what is happening. Don't shield a child from the uncomfortable emotions of death as a way to protect them; death is a fact of life they will have to encounter at some point, and a funeral for a loved one they were close to provides an opportunity for learning and growth.

Choose Specific Events

Death-related rituals are important and should be honored as ways of paying tribute to the deceased and coming together as a family and community. With that said, a child shouldn't feel pressured to attend all the events related to the passing. Educate them about the rituals that will be taking place, such as a wake, funeral service, burial, and post-service reception. Don't overwhelm them emotionally by forcing them to attend each one. Let them pick, or, if they aren't at a point to make this decision, choose the events that are less formal, like the wake and reception.

When at all possible, aim to include children in at least some funeral-related rituals. Leesman Funeral Home offers funeral, burial, and cremation services to the St. Clair County, IL, area. For over 80 years, they have been a family-owned and -operated business dedicated to supporting the local community during times of grief and loss. They also provide funeral pre-planning assistance and support. Call (618) 286-4511 or visit them online to arrange a consultation.