Divorce is a difficult experience for anyone to go through, but it’s especially hard on children. One of the most challenging tasks you’ll have upon deciding to end your marriage is breaking the news to the kids. While there’s no perfect way to broach the subject, it’s important to be properly prepared for the discussion. Your divorce attorney will give you invaluable advice tailored to your circumstances, but this general advice will help you discuss the divorce with your children in a healthy, loving manner. 

3 Suggestions for Talking to Your Kids About Divorce 

1. Spare Them the Details 

Although you want to have an open and honest relationship with your children, it’s not necessary to go into all the details surrounding your divorce. No matter how old your child is, sharing too much information about why your marriage is ending may confuse them or unduly burden them. Additionally, the more you tell them, the more it may seem like you’re blaming the other parent. Divorce attorneys warn parents to be cautious about what children are told, as this can impact later custody proceedings.

2. Consider Telling Them Together 

It benefits the children if you can sit down and talk to them together. Presenting a united front will show them it’s still possible to function as a family even if you will no longer be living in the same household. It will also prevent them from receiving conflicting messages from each side, which can cause more confusion in an already complex situation. This may not be possible or advisable in every circumstance, however, so talk to your divorce attorney about whether it’s appropriate in your case. 

3. Emphasize That It Isn’t Their Fault 

Children in split families often feel like they’re to blame for the divorce. When you sit down with them to have this conversation, make it clear that it’s not their fault and that you’ll both continue to love them just the same. It may take several conversations and a long time for them to accept this, but reassurance will help them. 

Telling your children you’re getting divorced is only one step you’ll need to take in the complicated process of ending your marriage. The experienced divorce attorneys at MacVean, Lewis, Sherwin & McDermott, P.C. will help you settle all the legal issues involved in terminating a union. Having served the Hudson Valley community of New York for over 130 years, the firm has represented the interests of numerous clients in matters of property and asset division, child custody and support, and alimony. Call (845) 343-3000 to schedule a consultation, or visit them online for more information on the family law services they provide.