When a friend or family member dies it’s important to consider how this event will affect your children. From deciding how much to tell them to whether they’ll visit the funeral home, there is a lot to consider. Here are some tips to help you navigate this time of grief in a way that supports the young members of the family.

How to Discuss Death With a Child

1. Tell the Truth

It can be tempting to use euphemisms or say that someone has “gone away for a while” to soften the reality of someone passing. However, children benefit from knowing the truth as it will help them gain an understanding of mourning. Being honest about what’s going on makes the child feel included and will help them understand why people around them may be upset. 

2. Be Prepared for Questions

Whether this is a child’s first experience with death or they’ve been to a funeral home for a memorial before they’ll likely have questions after hearing that someone died. Be prepared to share truthful replies. You don’t have to get into the details but know that queries like, “What happened?” and “Where did they go?” are likely.

It’s OK to share that you don’t know the answer to a question. Many inquiries may be unanswerable at the time so stick with the truth if you’re not sure of the answer.

Many people lean into their faith in times like this and may even ask a spiritual leader like a pastor or priest to be there while they tell a child about a death. These professionals have experience handling situations like this and can provide you both with guidance on how to process the news.

3. Encourage Participation

Participating in rituals like funerals and internments can make it much easier for children to acknowledge and begin processing loss. Explain what to expect during a service ahead of time so your little ones aren’t startled by the viewing of a loved one or by the behaviors of friends and family they’ll encounter there. Allow children to take breaks from funeral home events like memorials so they can play and relax. Everyone handles grief differently and young people should be allowed extra time to process.

If you’re looking for more advice on how to tell children about the death of a loved one contact the compassionate and experienced funeral directors at Stine-Kilburn Funeral Home of Lebanon in Warren County, OH. They’ve offered residents funeral pre-planning services and provided grief support since 1987. Call (513) 932-1239 or visit the website for information on how they help families in their times of need with planning, memorial items, and commemorative services.