Choosing what to wear to a funeral or memorial service can be a bit confusing. Unlike other formal occasions, a dress code is rarely communicated, and asking the deceased’s family members for guidance may feel like an imposition. That said, as highly traditional occasions, there are numerous options for appropriate funeral attire.

Black isn’t mandatory.

Wearing black to a funeral has been traditional since the days when Queen Victoria wore black for more than 40 years to mourn the loss of her beloved husband, Prince Albert. That said, the expected attire for most funerals includes dark and muted colors, such as navy or gray.  While a white shirt is customary for men, any muted color is acceptable.

Don’t attract attention to yourself.

Clothing, jewelry, and footwear should be understated and conservative. The goal is not to attract too much attention to yourself; instead, the focus should be on the deceased. Dresses that show too much skin, short miniskirts, vibrant or large-print neckties, and sky-high heels are probably better suited for another occasion. Jewelry, too, should be muted and understated.

Footwear selection is important.

For most memorial services and funerals, conservative footwear is preferable.  If you’re planning to attend a traditional graveside service, beware of wearing stilettos or other shoes with a thin heel, as they can break or get stuck while walking in grass. Men’s shoes should be smart and polished. 

The family sets the tone.

As “Celebration of Life” ceremonies become more and more popular, dress requirements for funerals become more complicated.  Many families request that those coming to pay their respects dress in attire that is representative of the deceased. That may mean mourners are asked to wear the deceased’s favorite color, or to don a ribbon supporting a cause important to the family, such as cancer or diabetes research.  As long as you are comfortable, it is always best to respect to the preferences of the immediate family.

Be conscious of culture.

While black is timeless and customary in the U.S. for a conventional memorial service or funeral, other cultures have different traditions.  For example, Chinese and Cambodian mourners historically wear white, and in Thailand, widows often wear purple. Purple is also a color of mourning in Brazil, which is worn with black to honor the loss of a loved one.

For additional  guidance on what to wear to a funeral or memorial service, the funeral home director and staff at Willow Funeral Home in Willow Springs, MO, may be of additional help. The kind and caring staff are always available to answer your questions and concerns regarding funeral arrangements and memorial service etiquette.  Call (417) 469-3141 or visit them online to learn more.