The birth of a first child is a major milestone in a marriage. While expectant parents may be focused solely on preparing for the baby’s arrival, they should also take time to ensure their marital relationship is on solid footing. According to counselor Laurie Burns LCSW-R CGP of Rochester, NY, many problems arise between partners after having a baby. Over the last 20 years, she has provided couples counseling to spouses adjusting to their new roles as parents. Below, she shares some of the most common postpartum issues that cause marital disputes.

3 Issues Couples Often Face After Having Children

1. Sharing Household Responsibilities 

Domestic responsibilities increase considerably with a baby in the house, and one spouse frequently feels like they’re doing it all alone. Uneven division of labor can lead to resentment. In couples counseling, spouses are encouraged to define distinct duties for each party and come to an agreement on what constitutes a fair distribution.

2. Finding Couple Time

Raising a baby requires a substantial amount of time and energy. Naturally many partners struggle to find time to focus on each other. However, neglecting this connection can take an irrevocable toll. While it may not seem romantic to schedule your love life, making set dates to enjoy each other without the company of the baby will help solidify the foundational relationship of your new family.

3. Financial Stress 

Finances are a common topic in couples counseling, but the sudden increase in expenses that come with a baby can create exceptional strain. In addition to the costs of setting up a nursery, one parent may wish to stay home for an extended period with the child, leading to less disposable income. Before the baby arrives, develop a budget and prioritize expenses together so you’re well prepared for the financial change.

Despite all the joy a baby brings into the household, the pressures of parenthood can create conflict in your relationship. If you are having trouble with your spouse or, better yet, you wish to prevent a problem before it arises, couples counseling can be a beneficial tool. Laurie Burns LCSW-R CGP has extensive training and experience helping spouses rediscover their passion for one another, communicate, and grow together as parents. Call (585) 734-6826 to set up an appointment, or visit her online for more information on available services.