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While divorce is difficult in and of itself, it’s especially challenging for couples to break the news to a child. To protect your little one’s psychological well-being, have a discussion prior to your divorce or separation. Here are some suggestions from a family lawyer on how to explain the situation to your children and prepare them for what’s to come.

Talking to Your Children About Divorce

1. Talk to Them as a Couple

Approaching your little ones as a couple will reinforce two things: one, that you’re all in this together, and two, that the children can count on both of you throughout the process.

2. Explain That You Are Still a Family

Start the conversation by letting the children know you are still a family, your family is simply changing and Mom and Dad don’t want to be together anymore. Reassure them that they are safe, and that everyone will get through this period together. Despite child custody issues, both parents should emphasize that they want to remain in their children’s lives.

3. Assure Them the Divorce Is Not Their Fault

family lawyerAs any family lawyer will tell you, this is a common worry for children of divorce. End this negative train of thought by saying the separation was not caused by anything they did or said—it is between you and your spouse, and both of you still love them.

4. Let Them Know They can Talk to You

Make sure the children know that all of their feelings are acceptable—whether that’s anger, resentment, guilt, or shame. Emphasize that whatever they feel is okay and they can always express their emotions to you. Leaving lines of communication open will help your children cope and strengthen your relationship.

5. Tell Them Your Plan

To whatever extent you feel is appropriate, let the children know what to expect. Will they be living with Mom or Dad, and when? Will there be shared custody between both parents, and when will they be with one or the other? These details may not be worked out yet, but the sooner you let your children know, the better it will be for their sense of security.

 

If you need a family lawyer in Sparta, WI, turn to Osborne, Tripp & Schmidt for help navigating turbulent times. Call today at (608) 269-2400 to speak with a divorce attorney, or visit their website for more information.

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